I Don’t Want To Cancel

Well my Husbands MESA will be on the 6th at 2pm, which could be near enough to my ER not to freeze after all. So I guess we’ll see. He goes tomorrow to see the Anaesthetist at 2.45 to go over the procedure.
I had my blood taken for my E2 levels today at the hospital. They will give the results to me when I go back on Friday for my ultrasound. I saw a Dr whilst I was there as I have been sick for 12 days with a cold, which now is a Sinus infection. She has put me on anti-biotic for 7 days and said we should consider cancelling if I don’t improve by Friday. She said the infection could affect egg quality.
I don’t want to cancel.

Hospital Cock Up!

I’m so stressed out and pissed off. The stupid hospital has totally messed things up and there is nothing we can do about it. When we first went to see the RE we wanted to do DI as we were ready to have a family, and we had had 10 years knowing that DH was Azoospermic with no sperm being found in biopsy 10 years ago. The RE then said we really should do another biopsy as technology has moved on and there could be hope after all. After much discussion we decided to only go forward with this plan if we did not have to freeze, to give us the best chance if they found anything at biopsy. We would do an IVF ICSI at the same time and in order not to waste my eggs have a donor on back up. Now when I’m on day 3 of stims we get a call saying that the Urologist cannot do short notice biopsy and we will have to freeze after all. If we were going to do it this way after all we wouldn’t have needed for me to go this high tech. I could have just done DIUI. All the money and intervention could be for nothing if DH’s MESA is a bust. And we are sure it probably will be. If the do find something its only likely to be a few. And that just won’t freeze or thaw well. I’m just so disappointed that our last hope for a biological child is now definitely over before we've even tried.
They are still going to do the biopsy just not the day before my ET like we had planned. We are waiting for the phone to ring and tell us when DH will go in for his MESA; we think it will be Wednesday. A whole week before me, so we will definitely be freezing. I just feel so bad for DH. Last time they found nothing, alive or dead, just immature sperm that couldn't be used. This was our only shot, and it feels pointless. All that pain for nothing.
I'm going to go make some home made soup and feed him up before Wednesday.

Gonal-F Day!

We have had a lovely day today. We woke up late then took a stroll in the snow to the shops. We brought some lovely cheese and bread to make a fondue. Ate far too much and snuggled on the sofa watching T.V all day.
We started the Gonal-F pen today. I found a great site that demonstrates it for you. My lovely Husband did a great job; he is in charge of the Gonal-F. We even recorded it for prosperity!

I Look Yucky.

My Husband is home Hooray!!
Oh how I’ve missed him.
Yesterday he had ago at giving me my Decapeptyl shot in my tummy. He is in charge of giving me my Gonal-F, which I start on Saturday. I’m excited to start but I have just found a little lump in my armpit, which is a bit sore. I’m wondering if it is something I should be worried about or not. I think I will go up the Hospital tomorrow just to get checked out. Better to be safe than sorry.
I have a stinking cold at the moment and I have blasted cold sores on my lip and nose. I look yucky.

Crappy Plan of Action

My last day on BCP’s tomorrow, brilliant!! I can’t wait to get this show on the road.
My DH is back tomorrow so I will be recruiting his help with shots. I think he will enjoy being involved in the whole process.
I am a little stressed as it has dawned on me that I am not happy with the plan of action. My RE has said that DH MESA procedure will be preformed the day before mine. It will take place at the local hospital. If they find something that they can use my egg retrieval will be done the next day at the same hospital. If they don’t find anything they can you use, I will have to travel an hour by train to a different hospital to have my ER and ICSI with donor sperm. Some stupid politics, about them being the only hospital in the state to be able to recruit and administer donor sperm. But what if they find only 4 sperm from my Husband and 36 eggs from me. Will the chuck the rest away? Will they say it’s not worth trying with the 4 sperm? I don’t want them to do that I would want them to use DH’s sperm and ICSI the rest with the donor sperm. Plus I want my Husband to be with me for my ER but a short tax ride is a little different to a taxi to the station an hour by train and then another taxi ride to the hospital, and that’s just getting there. We will both be in a bad way by the evening and will need a chaperone at this rate. We will have to make an appointment with the RE to discuss this. I don’t know why there should be a problem with shipping the DS to the local hospital, but there must be or the plan wouldn’t be the way it is.

Instructions for D-day

Well I did my first shot last night!
It wasn’t so bad I guess, but it did hurt when injected the medication.
I got all organised first and made a hot water bottle, then I iced my leg.
I drew up a list so I didn’t forget something.

1. Wash hands and dry with a clean towel.
2. Ice area
3. Clean area with swab in a covering a 2-inch circle.
4. Put needle on syringe
5. Draw up medication
6. Tap out air bubbles
7. Push up until a ball of liquid forms at the top.
8. Pinch 2 inches of skin and hold the syringe like a dart.
9. Dart the needle in at 90 degrees
10. Slowly push in the medication.
11. Count to 5 then take out the needle.
12. Hold a clean swab on it until bleeding stops.
13. Put hot water bottle on to disperse medication.

The phone rang just as I was counting to 5, so I whipped it out and grabbed the swab and answered the phone. It was my sister and she took my mind off things straight away. Thank goodness for sisters.

D day tomorrow

I start my Decapeptyl shots tomorrow, first time giving myself shots. I have to say I am nervous and to make matters worse DH is away until next week. I wish he could be here but it can’t be helped. Never mind I’m sure I’ll cope. In a week I will be a pro at this, and then I can open my eyes.

Needles, Needles Everywhere

I have not been sleeping well over the last few days. I must have been more apprehensive about seeing the nurse than I thought. If I’m not dreaming about falling out with my Husband then I have been dreaming about medication and needles. Big needles, fat needles, in fact just lots of bloody needles. I really must try and get a grip.
I had my appointment yesterday with the nurse and I sought of know the plan, but I’m still a little confused. The reason being is that the Nurse only spoke French, I only speak English, and although my darling husband speaks French, his vocabulary doesn’t stretch to medical jargon. So we kind of played charades most of the time. I go in on Monday to collect the Decapeptyl and syringes from the nurse and start 11/18. My husband will be away so I’m afraid it will just have to be me and my online cycle buddies with Dear Husband on speakerphone.
So many needles, I’m not sure how I’ll cope but I guess I will have to.
I also managed to see the Anesthetist, due to a cancellation, and he talked me through Egg Retrieval and Embryo Transfer. He went through the procedure and all the General Anaesthetic risks. That was a bit scary too!
Wow this whole process is really daunting.
Well below is my schedule, I think.

Medications: bcp/ Decapeptyl starting with 0.5ml on 11/18 for 7 days then 0.25ml until the end of treatment/Gonal F 11/26-30 (300ml in evening) /Pregnyl (when advised) Suprecycline (Antibiotic?)/Menopur after11/30/ Utrogestan (Progesterone)/ Estradiol
BCPs dates: 11/6-22
Lupron dates: I don’t think so
Stim dates: 11/26 - 12/5
ER date: Projected 12/7-10
Number retrieved:?
ICSI (y/n): Y
AH (y/n): Maybe?
Fert report:
ET date: Projected 12/11-14
Number transferred: ?
Beta date: Projected 12/21-24
It seems to make a little more sense now I've written it down, but not much!
I have several appointments booked already.
Blood Test on the11/30.
Blood test & Ultra sound on 12/02.
Blood test & Ultra sound on 12/05

Roller Coaster Here We Come !!!!!

My Darling Husband and I saw the RE last night and we got the green light to start. We are very excited and terrified at the same time. We are waiting to hear when the nurse can see us to explain the whole IVF process; I just hope she speaks English! It’s all so much trickier doing all this in a foreign country but I guess it can't be helped. I have been given the prescription for all the meds but the Doctor's handwriting is illegible. Why is that I wonder? It seems to be a problem that most Doctors have. All I can make out is Gonal F and Menopur, I think. There are 8 items altogether and one is the BCP's that I start Monday. Hopefully the nurse will shed some light on what the rest could be. I think I do BCP’s between 6/11 and the 22/11, stim between the 26/11 and 5/12, with ER around the 7/12. DH’s MESA round the same time and ET around the 14/12. But I won’t know for sure until the nurse clarifies things. I’m sure I’ll be an expert by Christmas but right now that seems a long way off. It feels like we have just got on a massive roller coaster that has been climbing for ages and we are nearly at the top where it’s going to get really crazy very quickly. The fear and excitement are mounting and I can't wait!